Back to Back Pregnancies

This was originally published on my old blog

Sometimes I feel like I have been pregnant forever. I know that a lot of women feel that way especially during the last trimester. In my case I feels at lot closer to the truth. When this next baby arrives (my last), I will have been pregnant for a total of 18 months in the last 24 months!

Sometimes I think having the babies back to back is crazy and other times I think it is brilliant.  I think it will be a couple of decades before we figure out which one it is.

There are a lot of pros with having babies back to back.

  • We will get all the diapers and other baby necessities out of the way at once!  I know a lot of people who wait until their first one is out of diapers before they start trying for the next.  Which means they are changing diapers for 4-5 consecutive years.   Yes we will have 2 in diapers but if everything goes according to average, then we will only be changing diapers for about 3-4 years
  • We are only going to have to get through the baby years once.  Anyone who has every had a baby knows the baby years are tough!  Having 2 babies 11 months apart is just ripping on the band-aid quickly.  Get the baby years out of the way at once.
  • No storing baby stuff “for the next one” because the next one is here!  After the next baby arrives we are not planning on having another, so there will be no need to store all the baby stuff for the next kid.  Once we are done with the bassinet, crib, etc they are out of here!
  • Cheaper in the long run.  Having 2 babies 11 months apart actually make it cheaper for childcare.   If we were to space them out 3-5 years apart and pay for childcare until both were in school full time, we would be paying for childcare for the next 8-10 years.  By having them so close together we are only paying for childcare for the next 5-6 years.
  • Built in playmate.  Everyone we talked to who had “Irish Twins”, they say one of the best things is the kids will have a built in playmate their own age

Some of the pros look pretty good, but lets be honest there are going to be a lot of cons too.

  • Pregnancy is exhausting.  I am 36 weeks along and my little one is very active.  She doesn’t want to be held for long.  She is on the verge of walking and delights in pushing her walking toy across the living room.  Chasing her around pretty much exhausts me…all the time!
  • 3-4 years of chaos.  Everyone we talked to who had “Irish Twins” have said the first 3-4 years are chaotic, because the babies are not yet at the same developmental stage.  I’ve been told making accommodations to encourage their own learning is going to require creativity.  I’m hoping my Type A, organizational personality will be able to sort through the chaos
  • Older sibling can’t help out.  When you have kids with a 3-5 year difference, the older kid can help occupy the younger kid when you need to do laundry, get dinner, etc.  With both of them pretty much the same age, this built-in helper doesn’t exist.
  • Double exhausting.  Having an infant is exhausting enough, having an infant and a toddler is double exhausting
  • Double the diapers.  Double the amount of diapers.  Yep!  We will have 2 in diapers at one time.  We do cloth at home, so we are going to have purchase more cloth diapers and covers.   We wash them daily, so that won’t change however with diapers from 2 babies it will no longer be a small daily load
  • Birthday parties.  If the next baby arrives on his expected due date, then both birthdays will be 14 days apart.  I’m not sure how we are going to handle this in the future.  Joint birthdays?  Individual birthdays?  We will figure it out when we need to.
  • What the hell will my body look like after?  I’m not a naturally thin person.  My body will never “just bounce back” after giving birth.  Losing 5 lbs is a huge amount of work for me, with strict diet and exercise.  After the last baby, I got within 10 lbs of my pre-pregnancy weight, but was still very squishy.  I had JUST started working out again when I got pregnant again!  So yes I’m very worried about what my post-pregnancy body will be.
  • Post-partum depression.  I had mild PPD after the last one.  It didn’t hit immediately, instead it hit around 10 week post-partum week.   It was very tough to get through that with one baby, let alone 2 babies.  Our nanny will still be with us, so that will be a big help, but I still worry about PPD.
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